Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain<\/a><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n If you\u2019re waiting for the waiter at a restaurant, aren\u2019t you the waiter?<\/strong><\/p>\n Slow Poke<\/a><\/p>\n Fly me to the Moon<\/a><\/p>\n I’d Have Baked a Cake<\/a><\/p>\n A song about Common Sense – Weed with Willie<\/a><\/p>\n Crazy<\/a><\/p>\n The Older I Get<\/a><\/p>\n Old Blevins<\/a><\/p>\n Yesterday<\/a><\/p>\n Help!<\/a><\/p>\n Up a Lazy River<\/a><\/p>\n Orange and the Green – Irish Rovers<\/a><\/p>\n Junk Food Junkie<\/a><\/p>\n Honesty<\/a><\/p>\n Nickelodean<\/a><\/p>\n Hello<\/a><\/p>\n You Don’t Send me Flowers<\/a><\/p>\n Never on a Sunday<\/a><\/p>\n I Should’ve Known Better<\/a><\/p>\n It\u2019s Raining Cats and Dogs. I know\u2026 I just stepped in a poodle. Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain If you\u2019re waiting for the waiter at a restaurant, aren\u2019t you the waiter? Slow Poke The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it … \n ![](\"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/HLINE.png\")
<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n As I’ve grown older, I’ve learned that pleasing everyone is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n (BILL)\u00a0 I’m responsible for what I say, not what you understand. Common sense is like deodorant.\u00a0 The people who need it the most never use it.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n (BILL)\u00a0 My tolerance for idiots is extremely low these days. I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously there’s a new strain out there.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n It’s not my age that bothers me, it’s the side effects.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n (BILL)\u00a0 I’m not saying I’m old and worn out, but I make sure I’m nowhere near the curb on trash day.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n As I watch this generation try to rewrite our history, one thing I’m sure of .. it will be misspelled and have no punctuation.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n Me, sobbing: “I’m not coming back here anymore … I’m not going to let you hurt me again. “My Trainer: “It was one sit-up.”<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n As I’ve gotten older, people think I’ve become lazy.\u00a0 The truth is I’m just being more energy efficient.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then he made the earth round…and laughed and laughed and laughed.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n (BILL)\u00a0 I’m on two diets. I wasn’t getting enough food on one.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n I put my scale in the bathroom corner and that’s where the little liar will stay until it apologizes.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n (BILL)\u00a0 My mind is like an internet browser. At least 19 open tabs, 3 of them are frozen, and I have no clue where the music is coming from.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n Hard to believe I once had a phone attached to a wall, and when it rang, I picked it up without knowing who was calling.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n Apparently, RSVP-ing to a wedding invitation “Maybe next time” isn’t the correct response.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n So, you’ve been eating hot dogs and McChicken all your life, but you won’t take the vaccine because you don’t know what’s in it?<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n Sometimes the Universe puts you in the same situation again to see if you’re still a dumbass.<\/strong><\/p>\n <\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n\n There is no such thing as a grouchy old person.
\n<\/strong>The truth is, once you get old you stop being polite and start being honest.<\/strong>I Did it My Way<\/a><\/strong><\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"