{"id":28121,"date":"2026-01-04T04:51:21","date_gmt":"2026-01-04T04:51:21","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/?p=28121"},"modified":"2026-01-07T05:45:04","modified_gmt":"2026-01-07T05:45:04","slug":"number-song-the","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/number-song-the\/","title":{"rendered":"Number Song, The"},"content":{"rendered":"

LISTEN ON YOUTUBE<\/a><\/p>\n

NUMBERS\r\nRecorded by Bobby Bare\r\nWritten by Shel Silverstein\r\n \r\n G<\/span>                                             D<\/span>\r\nI was sittin' here Friday suppin' on a glass of wine\r\n                                           G<\/span>\r\nWhen in walked a chick who almost struck me blind\r\n                                              C<\/span>\r\nShe had wet blue eyes and her legs were long and fine\r\n     D<\/span>                                         G<\/span>\r\nOn a scale of ONE to TEN (pause) I'd give her a NINE.\r\n \r\nG<\/span>                                    D<\/span>\r\nNow on my scale there ain't no TEN's, you know\r\n                                   G<\/span>\r\nNINE is about as far as any chick can go\r\n                                                    C<\/span>\r\nSo I flashed her a smile, but she didn't even look at me\r\n        D<\/span>                                  G<\/span>\r\nSo for brains and good judgement, give her a THREE.\r\n\r\n \r\n     G<\/span>                                          D<\/span>\r\nI said, hey sweet thing, you look like a possible EIGHT\r\n                                                      G<\/span>\r\nYou and me could, uh! make EIGHTEEN, if your head's on straight\r\n                                C<\/span>\r\nShe looked up and down my perfect frame\r\n        D<\/span>                                      G<\/span>\r\nAnd said these words that burned into my perfect brain.\r\n \r\n         G<\/span>                                     D<\/span>\r\nShe said, well, another one of those macho-matician men\r\n                                           G<\/span>\r\nTryin' to grade all women on scales of ONE to TEN\r\n                                                              C<\/span>\r\nAnd, uh!, you give me an EIGHT, well, that's a generous thing to do\r\n      D<\/span>                                G<\/span>\r\nNow, let's just see, just how much I give you.\r\n \r\n[CHANGE TO KEY OF A]\r\n   A<\/span>                                                 E<\/span>\r\nShe said you comin' on to me with that corny NUMBERS jive\r\n                                      A<\/span>\r\nYour style makes me smile, I give it a FIVE\r\n                                           D\r\nWhen you walked up I noticed that suit of (yores)\r\n     E                                              A\r\nIt's last year's double knit, frayed cuffs, give it a FOUR.\r\n \r\n    A                                   E\r\nThat must be your car parked out on the curb\r\n                                                    A\r\nThat 'SIXTY-NINE homemade convertible, A THREE and A THIRD\r\n                                         D\r\nAs for that build, I guess you're less than FIVE\r\n     E                                         A\r\n'cept for your pot belly, I'd give that a TEN for size.\r\n \r\n    A                                    E\r\nThat wine you're pourin' might be fine to you\r\n                                          A\r\nBut I'm used to fine champagne, I give it a TWO\r\n                                            D\r\nIt's hard to tell what your flashin' smile is worth\r\n      E                                   A\r\nI give it a SIX, you could use some dental work.\r\n \r\n     A                                                  E\r\nBut, It's your struttin' rooster act that really makes me laugh\r\n                                                             A\r\nIt may be a TEN to these country hens, but to me a THREE and A HALF\r\n                                                      D\r\nAnd there really ain't much to add once the subtractin's done\r\n    E                                        A\r\nAnd since there ain't no ZEROes, I give you a ONE.\r\n \r\n      A                             E\r\nShe walked out, while up and down the line\r\n                                                            A\r\nThe whole bar was laughin', sayin' BARE, what happened to your NINE\r\n                                               D\r\nNINE says I, hell soon as she started to talk I knew\r\n    E                                        A\r\nShe didn't have no class, I barely gave her a TWO.\r\n \r\n(TALK) Yeah! No matter how good they look at first\r\nThere's flaws in all of them\r\nThat's why on a scale of TEN to ONE, friend\r\nThere ain't no TEN.\r\n
X<\/div><\/pre>\n
[1] I was sittin’ in Friday’s suckin’ on a [4] glass of [wine
\nWhen in walked a chick who almost struck me [1] blind
\nHad wet blue eyes and her legs were long and [4] fine
\nOn a scale of one to [5] ten, I’d give her a [1] nine<\/p>\n
Now on my scale there ain’t no ten’s, you know
\nNine is about as far as any chick can go
\nSo I flashed her a smile, but she didn’t even look at me
\nSo for brains and good judgement, I’d give her a three<\/p>\n
I said, “Hey sweet thing, you look like a possible eight
\nYou and me could, uh! make eighteen, if your head’s on straight.”
\nShe looked up and down my perfect frame
\nAnd said these words that burned into my perfect brain<\/p>\n
She said, well, another one of those macho-matician men
\nKind who grade all women on scales of one to ten
\nAnd, you give me an eight, well, that’s a generous thing to do
\nNow, let’s just see, just how much I give you<\/p>\n
She said you comin’ on to me with that phony numbers jive
\nYour style makes me smile, I give it a five
\nWhen you walked up I noticed that suit of (yores)
\nIt’s last year’s double-knit frayed-cuffs, give it a four<\/p>\n
That must be your car parked out on the curb
\nThat sixty-nine homemade convertible, a three and a third
\nNow, as for your build, I guess (yore) less than five
\nExcept, for your pot belly, I’d give that a ten for size<\/p>\n
That wine you’re pourin’ might be fine to you
\nBut I’m used to fine champagne, I give it a two
\nIt’s hard to tell what your flashin’ smile is worth
\nI give it a six, you could use some dental work<\/p>\n
But, It’s your struttin’ rooster act that really makes me laugh
\nIt may be a ten to these country hens, but to me a three and a half
\nAnd there really ain’t much to add once the subtractin’s done
\nSince there ain’t no zeroes, I give you a one!<\/p>\n
She walked out, while up and down the line
\nThe whole bar was laughin’, said’ Bare, what happened to your nine
\nNine says I, hell soon as she started to talk I knew
\nShe didn’t have no class, I barely gave her a two<\/p>\n
Spoken:
\nYeah! No matter how good they look at first
\nThere’s flaws in all of them
\nThat’s why on a scale of ten to one, friend
\nThere ain’t no ten<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
LISTEN ON YOUTUBE NUMBERS Recorded by Bobby Bare Written by Shel Silverstein G D I was sittin’ here Friday suppin’ on a glass of wine G When in walked a chick who almost struck me blind C She had wet blue eyes and her legs were long and fine D … CLICK TO VIEW SONGNumber Song, The<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28121","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28121","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=28121"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28121\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28718,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28121\/revisions\/28718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=28121"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=28121"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=28121"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}