{"id":19684,"date":"2024-03-04T20:04:06","date_gmt":"2024-03-04T20:04:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/?p=19684"},"modified":"2025-10-25T22:21:38","modified_gmt":"2025-10-25T22:21:38","slug":"bar-jokes-24-rd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/bar-jokes-24-rd\/","title":{"rendered":"~~ Bar Jokes 24 – RD"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Taking the Bull\u2019s Pills<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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An elderly farmer had an old bull that lost its usual desire and no longer went near the cows. The farmer called the vet, who prescribed a pill to stimulate the bull\u2019s interest. A few weeks later, the farmer ran into a friend, who asked, \u201cHow\u2019s that bull?\u201d \u201cGreat!\u201d said the farmer. \u201cThe bull is back to his former frisky self.\u201d \u201cThat\u2019s fantastic. What miracle drug did the vet prescribe?\u201d \u201cI don\u2019t know,\u201d said the farmer. \u201cBut it tastes like licorice.\u201d<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Two Brothers<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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There was a man with no arms, who rang the church bell, but he did it with his face.\u00a0 He would run, crash his face into the bell, and a beautiful sound would echo across the valley.\u00a0 One morning, as he rang the bell, it started to swing, and he missed the bell and plummeted to his death.<\/p>\n

Two people passed by and the first wondered who it was.\u00a0 The second said “I don’t know, but his face rings a bell.”<\/p>\n

PASSAGE OF TIME<\/p>\n

His brother, with the same disability and same skills took the job, and the same thing happened.\u00a0 Straight down to his death.\u00a0 The same two people looked down, wondering who THIS one was.\u00a0 The second said “I don’t know, but he’s a dead ringer for his brother.”<\/p>\n

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Through a Red Light<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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You know, Hobs was driving to California when he approached a blinking red light\u2014the equivalent of a stop sign\u2014 He drove straight through without even slowing down.\u00a0 A cop hit his siren and pulled him over. \u201cWhy did you drive through the red light?\u201d the cop asked. \u201cI didn\u2019t,\u201d Hobs said.
\n\u201cI saw you.\u201d
\nHobs shook his head. \u201cI went through \u2028between the blinks.\u201d<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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A panda walks into a bar.<\/h2>\n

He gobbles some beer nuts, then pulls out a pistol, fires it in the air, and heads for the door.<\/p>\n

\u201cHey!\u201d shouts the bartender, but the panda yells back, \u201cI\u2019m a panda. Google me!\u201d<\/p>\n

Sure enough, panda: \u201cA tree-climbing mammal with distinct black-and-white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Superpowers<\/h3>\n

A guy goes onto a rooftop bar and is sitting next to a guy who says he\u2019s drinking a magical drink. He asks, \u201cWhat\u2019s so magical about it?\u201d. The guy drives a car and flies it around the rooftop. The other tries, but falls off and dies. The bartender shakes his head and says, \u201cY\u2019know, you\u2019re a real jerk when you\u2019re drunk, Superman.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Taking the Bull\u2019s Pills An elderly farmer had an old bull that lost its usual desire and no longer went near the cows. The farmer called the vet, who prescribed a pill to stimulate the bull\u2019s interest. A few weeks later, the farmer ran into a friend, who asked, \u201cHow\u2019s … CLICK TO VIEW SONG~~ Bar Jokes 24 – RD<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19684","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bar-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19684","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19684"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19684\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19684"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19684"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19684"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}