{"id":19679,"date":"2024-03-04T19:48:02","date_gmt":"2024-03-04T19:48:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/?p=19679"},"modified":"2025-10-25T22:21:45","modified_gmt":"2025-10-25T22:21:45","slug":"bar-jokes-23-rd","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/bar-jokes-23-rd\/","title":{"rendered":"~~ Bar Jokes 23 – RD"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Not At All Surprised<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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According to a new report, adverse side effects occurred in over 3,000 women who used Botox last year\u2014when questioned none of them seemed surprised. \u2014Crystal Lowery<\/div>\n
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Dropped Out<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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The last year I entered a marathon. The race started and immediately I was the last of all the runners. It was embarrassing. The guy who was in front of me, second to last, was making fun of me. Saying, “Hey buddy, how does it feel to be last?” I replied, “You really want to know?” So I dropped out of the race.<\/div>\n
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Astaire a Mess<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers were dining in New York. Ginger was resplendent in a ball gown and pearls, and Fred also sported evening wear. But the meal was marred when the waiter bringing their desserts tripped and covered Fred from head to toe in treacle sponge. \u201cI\u2019m terribly sorry,\u201d said the waiter. \u201cSo you should be,\u201d replied Fred. \u201cThanks to you, I\u2019ve pudding on my top hat, pudding on my white tie, pudding on my tails.\u201d<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Kind Words<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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A man is at the funeral of an old friend. He tentatively approaches the deceased\u2019s wife and asks whether he can say a word. The widow nods. The man clears his throat and says, \u201cPlethora.\u201d The widow smiles appreciatively. \u201cThank you,\u201d she says. \u201cThat means a lot.\u201d<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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End of a Sentence<\/h3>\n<\/header>\n
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I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of jail, but apparently you can\u2019t end a sentence with a proposition.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Not At All Surprised According to a new report, adverse side effects occurred in over 3,000 women who used Botox last year\u2014when questioned none of them seemed surprised. \u2014Crystal Lowery Dropped Out The last year I entered a marathon. The race started and immediately I was the last of all … CLICK TO VIEW SONG~~ Bar Jokes 23 – RD<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19679","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bar-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19679","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19679"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19679\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19679"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19679"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19679"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}