Jerry Eddy went into Elaine’s Restaurant and asked for a lobster tail.
\nThe staff person smiled sweetly and said, \u201cOnce upon a time there was this handsome lobster\u2026\u201d
\n\u2014Horse & Rider
\nRD Issue: February 1981
\nRELATED: 101 Fish Puns That Will Split Your Gills<\/p>\n
Did you hear they arrested the devil?
\nYeah, they got him on possession. \u2014Gregg Siegel
\nRD Issue: February 2006<\/p>\n
Q: How many telemarketers does it take to change a light bulb?
\nA: Only one, but he has to do it while you are eating dinner.
\n\u2014Eldon Weisheit
\nRD Issue: April 1997<\/p>\n
\u201cWe used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle, and if the bottle pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a nickel.
\nBy the time I was 14, I owned my own house.\u201d \u2014Gene Perret, Classic One-Liners
\nRD Issue: June 1997<\/p>\n
Sandy called Pricilla over: \u201cPricilla, I\u2019d like a bottle of wine.\u201d
\nPricilla: \u201cWhat year?\u201d
\nSandy: \u201cWell, I\u2019d like it right now, please.\u201d
\n\u2014Earl Wilson, Field Newspaper Syndicate
\nRD Issue: October 1984<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Seafood for thought Jerry Eddy went into Elaine’s Restaurant and asked for a lobster tail. The staff person smiled sweetly and said, \u201cOnce upon a time there was this handsome lobster\u2026\u201d \u2014Horse & Rider RD Issue: February 1981 RELATED: 101 Fish Puns That Will Split Your Gills The devil, you …