{"id":17224,"date":"2023-09-03T23:50:01","date_gmt":"2023-09-03T23:50:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/?p=17224"},"modified":"2026-03-13T22:32:50","modified_gmt":"2026-03-13T22:32:50","slug":"im-gonna-hire-a-wino-to-decorate-our-home","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/im-gonna-hire-a-wino-to-decorate-our-home\/","title":{"rendered":"I’m Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate our Home"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’m Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate our Home – [ LISTEN TO FIRST PART<\/a> ]
\n<\/span><\/h1>\n

[C] I came crawling home last night, like [F] many nights before: [C] I finally made it to my feet as she [F] opened up the [C] door. And she said, [F] \u201cYou\u2019re not gonna [G] do this any [C] more.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

{ CHORUS }
\n<\/b>She said: \u201cI\u2019m [C] gonna\u2019 hire a wino to [F] decorate our home, So [F] you\u2019ll feel more at [C] ease here, and you won\u2019t have to [G] roam. We\u2019ll take [C] out the dining room table, and put a [F] bar along that wall, and a [C] neon sign, to point the way, to our [G] bathroom down the [C] hall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

She said: \u201cJust [C] bring your Friday paycheck, and I\u2019ll [F] cash them all right here. And I\u2019ll keep on tap \u2013 for [C] all your friends, their favorite kinds of [G] beer. And for [C] you, I\u2019ll always keep in stock, those [F] soft aluminum cans. And when you\u2019re feeling [C] macho, you can [G] crush them like a [C] man.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

She said: \u201cWe\u2019ll [C] rip out all the carpet, and put [F] sawdust on the floor. Serve boiled eggs and [C] pretzels, and I won\u2019t cook no [G] more.
\n<\/span>There\u2019ll be [C] Monday night football on TV [F] above the bar. And a pay phone in the [C] hallway, when your [G] friends can\u2019t find their [C] car.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

[modulate]\u00a0\u00a0 <\/b><\/span>{ CHORUS }
\n<\/b>She said: \u201cI\u2019m [D] gonna\u2019 hire a wino to [G] decorate our home, So [G] you\u2019ll feel more at [D] ease here, and you won\u2019t have to [A] roam. We\u2019ll take [D] out the dining room table, and put a [G] bar along that wall, and a [D] neon sign, to point the way, to our [A] bathroom down the [D] hall.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

She said:[D]\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019ll get friendly service, and for [G] added atmosphere. I\u2019ll [G] slip on something [D] sexy, and I\u2019ll cut it clear to [A] here. Then you can [D] slap my bottom, every [G] time you tell a joke. Just as long as you keep [D] tipping, well, I\u2019ll [A] laugh until you\u2019re [D] broke.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

She said: [D]\u00a0 \u201cInstead of family quarrels, we\u2019ll [G] have a bar-room brawl, When the [G] Ham\u2019s bear say\u2019s its [D] closing time, you won\u2019t have far to [A] crawl. And when [D] you run out of money, [G] you\u2019ll have me to thank. You can sleep it off next [D]\u00a0morning, when I\u2019m [A] putting it in the [D] bank.\u201d\u00a0\u00a0<\/b><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/b>[modulate]\u00a0\u00a0 { CHORUS }
\nShe said: \u201cI\u2019m [E] gonna\u2019 hire a wino to [A] decorate our home, So [A] you\u2019ll feel more at [E] ease here, and you won\u2019t have to [B] roam. We\u2019ll take [E] out the dining room table, and put a [A] bar along that wall, and a [E] neon sign, to point the way, to our [B] bathroom down the [E] hall.\u201d<\/b><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’m Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate our Home – [ LISTEN TO FIRST PART ] [C] I came crawling home last night, like [F] many nights before: [C] I finally made it to my feet as she [F] opened up the [C] door. And she said, [F] \u201cYou\u2019re not … CLICK TO VIEW SONGI’m Gonna Hire a Wino to Decorate our Home<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[120,133,126,265,116,117,123,115,131],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17224","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-perflive","category-baritone-bill","category-bass-guitar-night","category-best-songs","category-live-baritone","category-live-piano","category-live-songlist-tenor","category-live-tenor","category-power-outage"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17224","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17224"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17224\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27422,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17224\/revisions\/27422"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17224"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17224"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17224"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}