{"id":15697,"date":"2023-05-06T15:41:09","date_gmt":"2023-05-06T15:41:09","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/?p=15697"},"modified":"2025-10-25T22:18:07","modified_gmt":"2025-10-25T22:18:07","slug":"bar-jokes-10","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/bar-jokes-10\/","title":{"rendered":"~~ Bar Jokes 10"},"content":{"rendered":"

RETURN TO BAR JOKE MAIN PAGE<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. A man walks into a bar and says, \u201cGive me a beer before the problems start!\u201d He drinks the beer and then orders another saying, \u201cGive me a beer before the problems start!\u201dThe bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, \u201cWhen are you going to pay for these beers?\u201dThe man answers, \u201cNow the problems start!\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. What\u2019s the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One\u2019s pretty heavy and the other\u2019s a little lighter<\/span><\/li>\n
  3. Mick says to Paddy: \u201cClose your curtains the next time you\u2019re shagging your wife. The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday.\u201dPaddy says: \u201cWell the joke\u2019s on them stupid bastards, because I wasn\u2019t even home yesterday.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n
  4. Mick goes to the vet with his goldfish. \u201cI think it\u2019s got epilepsy\u201d, he tells the vet.
    \n<\/span>Vet takes a look and says, \u201cIt seems calm enough to me\u201d.
    \n<\/span>Mick says, \u201cWell wait now, I haven\u2019t taken it out of the bowl yet\u201d.<\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  5. A man phoned the maternity ward at the hospital. \u2018Quick!\u2019 he said. \u2018Send an ambulance, my wife is goin\u2019 to have a baby!\u2019
    \n<\/span>\u2018Tell me, is this her first baby?\u2019 the intern asked.
    \n<\/span>\u2018No, this is her husband, Kevin, speakin\u2019.\u2019<\/span><\/li>\n
  6. Reilly went to trial for armed robbery. The jury foreman came out and announced,\u2018Not guilty.\u2019
    \n<\/span>\u2018That\u2019s grand!\u2019 shouted Reilly. \u2018Does that mean I can keep the money?<\/span><\/span><\/li>\n
  7. A tourist asks an Irishman: \u201cWhy do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?\u201dTo which the Irishman replies: \u201cWell if they fell forwards, they\u2019d still be in the bloody boat.\u201d<\/span><\/li>\n
  8. Murphy told Quinn that his wife was driving him to drink.Quinn thinks he\u2019s very lucky because his own wife makes him walk.<\/span>
    \nMrs. Feeney shouted from the kitchen, \u2018Is that you I hear spittin\u2019 in the vase on the mantle piece?\u2019\u2018No,\u2019 said himself, \u2018but I\u2019m gettin\u2019 closer all the time.\u2019<\/span><\/li>\n
  9. Finnegin: My wife has a terrible habit of staying up \u2019til two o\u2019clock in the morning I can\u2019t break her out of it.Keenan: What on earth is she doin\u2019 at that time?
    \n<\/span>Finnegin: Waitin\u2019 for me to come home.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    RETURN TO BAR JOKE MAIN PAGE<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    RETURN TO BAR JOKE MAIN PAGE A man walks into a bar and says, \u201cGive me a beer before the problems start!\u201d He drinks the beer and then orders another saying, \u201cGive me a beer before the problems start!\u201dThe bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after … CLICK TO VIEW SONG~~ Bar Jokes 10<\/span><\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[67],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15697","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bar-jokes"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15697","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15697"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15697\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15697"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15697"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.robertandrews.net\/songs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15697"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}