Bricklayer, The

by the Corries

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Dear Sir I write this note to you to tell you of my plight
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For at the time of writing it I'm not a pretty sight
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My body is all black and blue, my face a deathly grey
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And I write this note to say why I am not at work today
 
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While working on the fourteenth floor some bricks I had to clear
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But tossing them down from such a height was not a good idea
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The foreman wasn't very pleased he is an arkward sod 
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And he said I had to cart them down the ladders in me hod
 

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Well clearing all these bricks by hand it was so very slow
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So I hoisted up a barrel and secured a rope below
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But in me haste to do the job, I was to blind to see
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That a barrel full of building bricks was heavier than me
 
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And so when I untied the rope the barrel fell like lead
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And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead
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I shot up like a rocket, and to my dismay I found
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That halfway up I met the bloody barrel coming down
 
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Well the barrel broke me shoulder as to the ground it sped
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And when I reached the top I banged the pulley with me head
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But I clung on tightly numb with shock from this almighty blow
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While the barrel spilled out half it's bricks some fourteen floors below
 
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When these bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor 
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I then outweighed the barrel and so started down once more
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But I clung on tightly to the rope me body racked with pain 
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And halfway down I met the bloody barrel once again
 
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Now the force of this collision halfway down the office block
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Caused multiple abrasions and a nasty case of shock
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But I clung on tightly to the rope as I fell towards the ground
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And I landed on the broken bricks the barrel had scattered round.
 
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Now as I lay there on the ground I thought I'd passed the worst
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But the barrel hit the pulley wheel and then the bottom burst
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A shower of bricks rained down on me I didn't have a hope
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As I lay there bleeding on the ground I let go of the bloody rope
 
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The barrel now being heavier so started down once more
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It landed right across me as I lay there on the floor
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It broke three ribs and my left arm and I can only say
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I hope you`ll understand why I am not at work today