~~ Bar Jokes 22 – RD

Matching wedding bandwidths

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet to see who they really are. —Will Ferrell
RD Issue: June 2021
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Doggone!

At the bank where I am a teller, a couple with three large dogs in their minivan pulled up to my drive-in window. When the man handed me his deposit slip, the dogs began to climb over him. Pushing them aside, he looked at me sheepishly. “They think we’re at McDonald’s,” he said. —Lissa Snyder
RD Issue: February 1997

Kid’s logic

We took our granddaughter out to lunch. After we got back, a package was delivered with postage due. Neither of us had any money, but our granddaugter took out a $5 bill.  Surprised, Cynthia asked how she came to have that much money.
“Well,” she said, “Grandpa was awfully careless with his money and left this on the table, so I just picked it up.”
—D. Elton Trueblood
RD Issue: January 1950
RELATED: 100 Short Jokes for Kids That Are Easy to Remember

Alcohol-free zone

My brother described a situation at his town, where they ran out of whiskey:  He said he lived for days on nothing but food and water. —PM newspaper
RD Issue: November 1941